sad sad sad

Feeling drowsy this morning.. Hardly can keep a smile on my face.. Was quiet and people started to ask me why am I so quiet and it’s not like me.. Why are you just sitting or standing there? Why the face? x_x From these words, does that mean others think that I’m a very loud talkative annoying person? Dun care.. How people want to describe me, it’s up to them. I have no control over how one look at others. One’s action gives people impressions. If others have a good impression on me, I’m good with that. If others have a bad impression on me, I will take it as they are judging a book by its cover. Or they have no idea on how to judge a person. For me to be writing this, I’m sure there will be people saying that I’m just cheating myself. I’m being stupid. Whatever! This is the way I like to live my life. I dun interfere with other’s life so why should they be saying shits?

I’m not being indirect to anyone here. Just that today’s mood swung to the down side. My emotion hasn’t been much on the bright side these few days. The highest is at the border line. I feel like I’ve stepped to a slot that I’ve been through before. The same thoughts, as last time, repeating over and over again in my mind. The same emotions I had. I don’t want this to repeat itself once more. It’s saddening and makes no point. These emotions are the emotions that I would want it to be hiding somewhere and not to reveal itself. There just aren’t many things that make me happy. The things that happen in front of me, the things that I see, just make me feel sad. Maybe I’m just being paranoid. As many people have said before, a picture is worth a thousand words. Maybe what I see might not be what I think. There are just too many possibilities.

The weather today was crazy. It was as hot as hell in the morning. Then suddenly there came a loud thunder and followed by a heavy downpour. That time I was in the Bio lab. It was so hot in there. I unbuttoned 2 buttons of my shirt and it was still hot. When it rained, there seems to make not much different in the room temperature. When I walked out of the lab, it’s like you’ve suddenly walked out of a burning forest and proceed to a cold storage. There was a 90min break before my afternoon class starts. I was sleeping at the PS area after having my most horrible “lunch”. When the class was about to start, 20mins before class starts? I had this stomachache. Asked my dad to bring me home and I skipped the Physics class. From a very clear point of view, my stomachache was caused by my horrible lunch. Ate 2 pieces of curry puffs and 3 fried crab sticks. Those are the worse fried crab sticks I’ve ever tasted. Firstly, it’s not crispy. 2^nd, it’s not tasty. 3^rd, it looked like it’s over fried. It’s impossible for me to be eating those crab stick like that alone which Jason claims that it’s the “Original taste”. -_- So I added some chili sauce. The chili sauce.. ANOTHER YUCK! They add water to it. Making it taste sour. -_- I had no choice but to swallow the “food”. Was too hungry already by lunch time. Only had 4 pieces of cheese toast this morning as breakfast.

In Bio today, the tutor’s tone made me feel like we are a burden to Earth. He said that, through statistics, the main problem of Global Warming is caused by over population. Human burns down rainforest for timber and land. The destruction of rainforests leads to soil erosions and floods. Human activities of farming lead to eutrophication and deaths of marine lives. When human clear rainforests, the amount of O2 will decrease and CO2 will increase and hence raising the global temperature and melting the ice at the poles. The melting of ice at the poles will cause the polar bears and the penguins to lose their habitat and die off. Here comes the important one – Before the crisis of over-population, there isn’t as much disaster as now. -_- so will it be better if we just die off now? Sacrifice ourselves for the sake of Earth’s survival. -_-